Moms! Parenting an ADHD child is hard and that’s okay!
As you know mental health is such an important topic for mothers; it’s also a huge topic towards children as well. You turn on the news or even social media about and learn how children have committed suicide and my heart aches for these parents. It’s so hard to distinguish depression and other mental health disorders in children. Parenting can be a struggle no matter if you are a first-time mom or a 5th-time mom. Every time it is different.
Moms! Parenting an ADHD child is hard and that’s okay!
Did you know? 1 in 6 U.S. children aged 2–8 years (17.4%) had a diagnosed mental, behavioral, or developmental disorder? After reading this I could resonate with this and understand it more. I’ve been a mom of an ADHD’er for the last almost three years and it has been such a ride especially recently. Parenting an ADHD child is different for everyone. No ADHD child is alike. ADHD is also just not hyperactivity. A lot get the misconception of that. He has his highs and also his lows.
We see a pediatric neurologist every year and unfortunately, before the age of five, no doctor recommends medication (to help regulate their symptoms). You have to find ways to help manage the symptoms. Therapy, occupational therapy, essential oils and more. After the big move, it has taken a toll on A and his performance at school; socially and academically.
He had such a hard time making friends and concentration. This kicked him in overdrive. Going from a 13 student kindergarten class to 26 is big. For an ADHD child it is massive. The overstimulation sets in and sometimes negative behavior. What one parent may think is a child having a tantrum, running around like nut, or possibly even using vulgar language or hitting others is; their way of expressing their ADHD is out of control.
When your child comes to you and says I don’t know why I did that. My brain is just going crazy. That is when I knew I had to do something to help him.
I would literally cry at night after he went to bed. Feeling so helpless as a mom. Not being able to help him like any parent would feel they need to.
Boys are more strong willed so parenting can feel the hardest
A few things to keep in mind when parenting an ADHD child
- It isn’t all that it seems. There is a light at the end of the tunnel: After moving, A had such a troubling time transitioning. His ADHD has been in overdrive. From behavioral (acting out, using bad words and so on) to being overly emotional and hyper. Then when I ask why he has done what he did he explains his brain is going too fast and can’t control it. I would curl up some nights in tears knowing I couldn’t help my son. That’s when I knew to make another appt with the neurologist.
- Don’t always believe that you have a troubled child: It’s how they reacted towards the surroundings that can affect them. Being overstimulated can increase their ADHD behavior.
- No judgment towards other parents; they just don’t understand:I remember at three when we had our first IEP meeting for prek. A was throwing the worst tantrum and ripped the paper off of the bulletin board. I was horrified. The OT specialist explained don’t worry. He’s reacting to being overstimulated. At this age they barely understand what is going on. That us why some react this way.
- It can be lonely: Other parents would look at us like we were crazy. It’s been a lonely road of parenting. We’ve never been able to go to mommy groups for this reason. Unfortunately, sometimes you get judged.
I just want to say! Check in with those parents of ADD, ADHD, Autistic and more. Even just listening can help them so much. Parenting our future can seem hard especially when you have a special needs child. Helping them the best way we can is so important 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼
The transition between kindergarten and grade one seems to be super difficult for a lot of sensitive or easily stimulated kids. This is super informative!
AS the mom of child with ADHD that is now grown, please know that it really does get easier! My daughter is a productive member of society and the pressure to fit inside a box specified by the schools is no longer there. When she finished school, she started to really thrive as she found her own path to learning.
There really is a light at the end of the tunnel!
Thank you so much you are so sweet. I know he’s only five so sometimes it can be hard understanding if it is adhd or his age. After moving it’s definitely been a transition we honestly didn’t think would happen. I’m hoping as time goes on things will get better.
You are so right on all of this! I completely understand what you are going through. My younger brother battled ADHD and dyslexia growing up and it wasn’t easy, especially because both of my parents worked a lot so I was his primary caretaker. Doing homework together, I thought I was going to lose my mind. I will say it definitely gets better. I never thought there would be a light at the end of the tunnel. I’m proud to say my brother went to a trade school and is super successful now! More than his siblings! You’re doing a great job, mama! Keep it up!! xo
That’s so great to hear
Such important tips for parents of kids with ADHD. Sometimes a listening year is just what we as parents need. My girls both suffer from anxiety, so I know the importance of advocating for mental health issues!
I understand. Two of my children, and I believe my mother have ADHD. I sometimes have to remind myself that they are not having ADHD on purpose, it is who they are, and there are benefits to it. You just have to work with schools and family to find the best solutions so that every child can shine.
Parenting children period is difficult but when your child has an “extra” something it is like parenting in “hard mode.” Thanks for sharing your advice.